Hummus

I made this along with homemade pita, which I'll post separately. I'm slowly becoming obsessed with breadmaking, probably because I swear by the Atkins diet. Anyway, here is the recipe for hummus, adapted from Epicurious. Well, to be fair, the recipe was nearly perfect. So it's barely adapted. My comments are in italics...

What's in it:

• 2 cups drained well-cooked or canned chickpeas, liquid reserved. LIQUID RESERVED!!!! RESERVE THE LIQUID!!!! It's easy to miss this and dump all this delectable chickpea flavored water down the sink...why would you need this, after all? But you do, because your hummus will be thick and chunky without it. If you didn't pay attention to this extremely obvious notation, you can use water, but the liquid reserve has more flavor.
• 1/2 cup tahini (sesame paste), optional, with some of its oil. Not optional, tahini is a must for hummus, I'm not sure what kind of crack the author was on. In our grocery store, tahini was by the olives. It tastes a lot like natural peanut butter. I plan to try making a peanut butter hummus, since peanut butter is significantly cheaper than tahini.
• 1/4 cup extra-virgin olive oil, plus oil for drizzling
• 2 cloves garlic, peeled, or to taste. I actually put in 3, but I'm a garlic fiend.
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
• 1 tablespoon ground cumin or paprika, or to taste, plus a sprinkling for garnish
• Juice of 1 lemon, plus more as needed. I put in more. Lemony hummus has a nice fresh flavor. I also didn't use a fresh lemon, because I'm too lazy to juice. I'm sure it's better with fresh lemon juice, but the stuff in the squeezy bottle worked fine, in my opinion.
• Chopped fresh parsley leaves for garnish. I rarely feel like buying parsley, so I didn't. I can't swear it wouldn't be better with parsley, but it's great without it.

How to make it:

This is the simplest thing ever. It all goes in the food processor. Except for the parsley, according to the recipe, which, as I mentioned above, I ditched anyway. Anyway, pulse everything until it starts to get smooth, and slowly add the reserved chickpea liquid (or water, if you forgot to reserve the chickpea liquid) through the cool entry tube in the top of the processor until the hummus is the right consistency. By which I mean, the consistency of hummus. If you are at a loss, go to a middle eastern restaurant.

Taste. Add stuff. Taste again. It's amazing how precise I feel I need to be with the flavors when I get to taste it after each adjustment. It never quite gets perfect...until it's all gone.

Food processor yayayayay!!!!!!!!

I was slowly going crazy because I didn't have a food processor. This may seem ridiculous, but I swear that 99% of the recipes on the Food Network require one. I didn't notice this when my cooking obsession first manifested, but once I got past the infatuation stage and actually began to consider making something, my excitement over a recipe unfolding on tv would turn to nearly suicidal frustration, because 20 minutes into the show Giada would say, "And then you put everything into the food processor..."  I soon realized that every recipe conceived from the time of Creation requires a food processor, and that I couldn't possibly make anything worthwhile without it. 

So I bought a 12 cup Kitchenaid food processor, as recommended by America's Test Kitchen. A little pricey, but it has so many delightful attachments that it seems worthwhile. My favorite shreds cheese; after manually shredding enough cheese to fill a pickup truck in preparation for a Cinco de Mayo party (or at least, watching the friend I designated for the task shred the cheese), I see incredible value in this capability. 

The day after the food processor arrived, I had to take a mental health day in order to spend some time with it. The first thing I made was hummus (perfect), followed by falafel (ok, chickpeas in tandem, but we have a middle eastern theme going).  The second day I was forced to again work at home, since I didn't think the food processor was yet ready to part with me. I made pesto (ran out of olive oil partway through, and had no car to go to the grocery store, so it's a little thick, but that can't be blamed on the food processor). Then we used it to shred cheese for quesadillas. 

At one point, in the height of my ecstasy, I considered taking the leftover chicken from our Cinco de Mayo party and shredding it for chili in the food processor. Then I started to have bad acid flashbacks from my time with braces in high school, during which my mother would puree whatever she happened to be cooking and pour/scrape it into a glass for me. I later realized that first instincts are always the best, and that I should have processed it.  I instead manually cut the chicken into pieces, during which I sliced off a significant portion of the tip of my left thumb. I can only assume this was a thrilling revenge for my scorned processor.

In summary, buy a Kitchenaid food processor. Maybe karma will make my thumb tip grow back.

Chocolate Gooey Ecstasy

I idolize Ina Garten, who creates amazing food on the Barefoot Contessa, a show on the Food Network. She used to be a White House nuclear policy budget analyst. I can only assume that she was harsh on the budget, because I've never seen her nuke anything on the show. In honor of Ina, I refuse to purchase a microwave. It is too much of a temptation anyway, as I'd be inclined to take the easy way out and microwave everything for reheating, even though it turns it to shoe leather or baby food. God forbid, I might buy a "Easy Meals in the Microwave" book.

Ina made a lovely 40th anniversary dinner for her husband, Jeffrey. The best part was a brownie pudding, which sounds a little bizarre, but really just means a gooey chocolate pudding -- sort of a lava/volcano idea, except that that gooey part encompasses most of the dessert. What makes it a brownie is the thin, crispy layer on top. And though I'm not the biggest chocolate fan in the world, it's almost painfully amazing.

Before you dive into this recipe, make sure that you have some sort of oven safe pan inside which to place the main 2 quart baking dish. Basically, you need to put the dish that holds the dessert inside something else that holds water, and all of that goes into the oven. I was surprised by this halfway through the first time I made it (I'm not so good with reading ahead), but luckily had a turkey roasting pan leftover from Thanksgiving that worked ok.

The Ingredients

1/2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter, plus extra for buttering the dish (I have to admit to regularly using salted butter, even for baking. Maybe it's because I love salt, but I've never noticed any particularly ill effects of this error)
4 extra-large eggs, at room temperature
2 cups sugar
3/4 cup good cocoa powder
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
Seeds scraped from 1 vanilla bean (Well. I have refused to bother with this, all three times I've made this dish. I just throw in some vanilla, which is probably not as good, but it's a hell of a lot easier).
1 tablespoon framboise liqueur, optional (Yes, optional, though after adding it to this cake, I've freely added it to anything chocolate that I make. I really do think it deepens the flavor. Plus, it can be added to champagne for a great brunch drink, so it doesn't sit around gathering dust).
Vanilla ice cream

The Work
Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F. Lightly butter a 2-quart (9 by 12 by 2-inch) oval baking dish. Melt the 1/2 pound of butter and set aside to cool.

In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the eggs and sugar on medium-high speed for 5 to 10 minutes, until very thick and light yellow (If you don't have a Kitchenaid, which, due to these difficult economic times, I don't, you can use a hand mixer. It's more tiring, but effective). Meanwhile, sift the cocoa powder and flour together and set aside (If you are using a hand mixer for the eggs, I recommend not doing this simultaneously unless you have four hands. In which case, please send a photo).

When the egg and sugar mixture is ready, reduce the speed to low and add the vanilla seeds, framboise, if using, and the cocoa powder and flour mixture. Mix only until combined. With mixer still on low, slowly pour in the cooled butter and mix again just until combined.

Pour the brownie mixture into the prepared dish and place it in a larger baking pan. Add enough of your hottest tap water to the pan to come halfway up the side of the dish and bake for exactly 1 hour. I recommend putting the pan inside the pan into the oven before adding the water. Otherwise, it is possible, speaking from experience, to dump half of the very hot water into your oven, resulting in heart-stopping panic. A cake tester inserted 2 inches from the side will come out 3/4 clean. The center will appear very under-baked; this dessert is between a brownie and a pudding.

I recommend that you serve it with vanilla ice cream to cut the richness. OK, Ina suggested it too, but I really strongly suggest it. I think someone might keel over from the sweet deliciousness if you don't. Oh, and as with my last post, photo is courtesy of the Barefoot Contessa. I swear I'll start taking photos soon.

Sausage-Stuffed Fungi

I love to throw a party, and I love to spend the entire day in the kitchen preparing for it. It's like a satisfying workout (I imagine, from what I've read); I feel accomplished when I'm done, except that I have a tangible product, rather than the hope of an awesome body sometime in the very distant future. Well, I guess that sweat is quite tangible, but it's not really the same. Anyway, it's a struggle to find a combination of recipes that keep me busy and happy all day and result in a bevy of delightful compliments, but that I don't have to spend too much time on once everyone arrives. Once the alcohol starts flowing, it's hard to remember when you put that cake in the oven; sometimes you don't remember until the smoke alarm sounds.

Sausage stuffed mushrooms fit my requirements, and I have to restrain myself not to make them for every party. In addition to the fact that they take some work, result in raving reviews, and can mostly be made ahead of time, I also love them because they seem so cruel to vegetarians. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate vegetarians (except that their continued attendance at my parties forces me to think about something other than meat, which may someday lead me to take them out with the uzi that I don't yet possess), but I feel a small measure of retribution has been eked out when you take one of their precious vegetables and stuff it full of meat. Well, a mushroom isn't really a vegetable, but almost.

Onto the recipe, adapted from epicurious. Put that uzi out of your mind, you're going to make something with lots of sausage and cheese!

The Ingredients
3 Italian hot sausages, casings removed (I've found that the hot part is crucial, though if you need to you can get regular Italian sausage and just add crushed red pepper to taste; sometimes I add more anyway)
1 1/2 teaspoons dried oregano
1 cup Parmesan cheese (about 3 ounces)
1/2 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 8-ounce package cream cheese, room temperature (I hate to say it, but you actually can use the lower fat neufchatel and it doesn't negatively impact the taste of the appetizer)
1 large egg yolk
Olive oil
24 large (about 2-inch-diameter) mushrooms, stemmed (Don't you dare get those stupid white button mushrooms. I use crimini. You might be able to go more exotic than that, but at your own risk).
1/3 cup dry white wine

The Work

Clean the mushrooms. Remember, they live in .... nasty dirty excrement. I learned from the Barefoot Contessa that one should gently clean the mushrooms with a damp clean kitchen towel rather than running them under the tap and scrubbing them. This does work well, since otherwise the mushrooms get pretty waterlogged. But it's pretty labor-intensive. Alternatively, wash them the easy way, remove the stems, place them on a cookie sheet with the pocket facing down, and bake for about 10 minutes at 350. They'll sweat off a lot of that water. I actually recommend doing this even if you take the careful Contessa route, because some mushrooms are just wet. The first time I made these, I ended up with about half an inch of liquid after cooking the mushrooms. They still tasted fantastic, but they were pretty pissed off at me for drowning them. No point in angering your food.

Crumble the sausage and sauté with oregano in heavy large skillet over medium-high heat until sausage is cooked through and brown, breaking into small pieces with back of fork (try to get it into pretty small crumbles, you want the sausage to fill the mushroom, not the other way around), about 7 minutes. Using slotted spoon, transfer sausage mixture to large bowl and cool (I recommend a paper towel in the bowl to sop up some of the oil; these things are decadent enough without it). Mix in 1/2 cup Parmesan cheese, Worcestershire sauce, and garlic powder, then cream cheese. Season filling with salt and pepper; mix in egg yolk. I also like to chop up the stems of the mushrooms (assuming you are using criminis; stalks of some other types of mushrooms are not delightful) and put them into the filling. This adds some bulk and intensifies the mushroom flavor. It also prevents the filling from being overwhelmingly rich in its cheesiness.

Brush 15x10x2-inch glass baking dish with olive oil to coat. Brush cavity of each mushroom cap with white wine (maybe my palette just isn't that sensitive, but I've forgotten the white wine step a couple of times and didn't notice any particularly ill effects on the final product; the advantage of using the wine, however, is that you have an open bottle of wine that you are forced to drink while cooking); fill with scant 1 tablespoon filling and sprinkle with some of remaining 1/2 cup Parmesan cheese. Arrange mushrooms, filling side up, in prepared dish. (Can be made 1 day ahead. Cover and chill.)

Preheat oven to 350°F. Bake uncovered until mushrooms are tender and filling is brown on top, about 25 minutes. Note that they are very, very hot. If you give them to the guests, they will not be able to resist immediately popping one in their mouths, and it will hurt. They may scream, and the neighbors will call the cops. So to save everyone some agony, don't serve them for at least 5 minutes.

OK. Don't be alarmed when they look nothing like this photo. I just started this blog, and I intend to take yummy-looking photos, but I haven't made these mushrooms since I began this. So I have no photo. I stole it from Sandra Lee, and though these are sausage stuffed mushrooms, if you look closely you can see that they have some green crap in them as well. Don't panic when your mushrooms have no green stuff, because I've chosen a recipe that replaces that with delicious cheese. Mmmmm...